For the Pill that lived in Pain…

Written by Dilip Muralidaran on June 27, 2009 – 5:44 pm -

If Michael Jackson was wine, he would possibly be by far the best wine i would have ever tasted in my entire lifetime. I’ve always had this connectivity when Michael speaks out, especially about his childhood and about the children of the world. I think we share a common thread, in the sense that like his, my childhood was not a normal one. Being left out is no fun, especially when your friends are out there playing in the field and you have to sit and watch or see kids around you do all sorts of wonderful things… hiking, cycling, scout, NSS.. you name it. If you even suggest you want to attempt such things, you get laughed at and your capabilities constantly question everyday. It’s not easy, i can tell you that for sure.

Michael Jackson was a pill, a pain killer perhaps. When you turn on thriller and listen to “Beat It” you know you just gotta beat it if you wanna stay alive. You live by the words and with the music. You know you have to “Keep the Faith” no matter what comes your way and if something needs to change for the better it needs to start with the “Man in the Mirror”.

Often his love for other people and others problems will leave you “Speechless” quite literally, that’s Michael Jackson to me. When every time i wanted to jump off a railway track on to an oncoming train and end it all somewhere, something that i heard last night on tape would stop you from irrationality and make you keep going no matter what.

Of course If you are just pissed off and want to find out “Why you wanna trip on me” or just “Scream” and say “They don’t really care about us” when the whole system comes crashing on you, you could always say “Leave me alone” and get out of it. A song for everything, every emotion, every situation, every moment of your life.. its all a song. That’s Michael Jackson. Of course there is this perfectionist and this performer in him like no other. When you watch a young African-American from the most lowest sections of the society grown up on stage and become the biggest phenomenon in the entertainment industry, having someone like that as your role model never hurts. I think its one of the possible factors of my success today, i’ve looked up to people who were born genius and i’ve tried to do achieve what they tried to in my own way. Of course i’ve failed miserably many a times but its never made me stop trying and i guess i’ve at least gotten somewhere.

Today is possibly by far the most bitter day in my life since my grand fathers death. Words fail me when i try tell how much of a personal loss it is to see the most inspiring personality of your life, the biggest motivational factor you ever had pass away. I’ve been so busy onsite with a client i did not read the news or check twitter. When a friend messaged me i was irritated, trust me i’ve heard atleast 500 such “Michael Jackson is dead” hoax messages. Unfortunately, today was bitter reality.

I know i will pick myself up, lick my wounds and move on.. life moves on but life is never going to be the same again. I would just like to say Michael Jackson was the most significant and the most beautiful thing that ever happened to me. Life is a compromise, i’m never going to meet the idol i admired for all these years. This is not the first compromise i’m making though but its possibly the most painful one.

You will be missed Michael, i’m sure everytime i see cheap acts imitate you on screen or some punk rips off your music back here in india, your memory will never die in me and the millions of others that you’ve touched in a way words fail to explain.

Tags: condolence, funeral, Michael Jackson, mourning, tribute
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