I love my balls, seriously!

I happen to subscribe to the National Geographic RSS feeds and today i came upon something awesome.

Before i tell you what it is, let me tell you a little bit of a story.

There once lived in the world where secular scientists and normal people who do not hallucinate about imaginary shit bags in the sky telling you when to put your crotch into what and where. These people came up with a discovery called stem cells. Without going into technical details much, in simple and crisp terminology stem cells help us understand the human cell structure and germ therapy better, thereby enabling us to find possible cures to aids, cancer and such likely other deadly disease that wreak havoc on human kind.

However there were a few sects of people called Catholics, Muslims, Hindus and Jews who believed in a imaginary entity whom no one has ever seen. He is called GOD. Now this god mother fucker who does not exist in the first place apparently put some shit called soul into an embryo when the man told the woman "honey, i was about to pull out but i cummed too fast, sorry!" and the woman had a swelling in her tummy three months later.

Now this embryo of course was voluntarily donated by nice minded and good hearted humans but then the imaginary "Soul" entity happened to have life in it and using it to do stem cell research was considered a blasphemy, a term religious fucktards use when science beats the fucking shit out of religion and god every other time and they have no evidence to prove religion right and science wrong. In other words, we call that "Appeal to Authority". "You should not do that! Why? Because you should not!" Typical Crap, accusing people who want to save lives as murderers and then calling upon Jihad because you can have 7 virgin pussies to lick for yourselves in heaven when you die.

Now the good news is, we can extract stem cells from guess what? Human testicles and this technology will be mainstream before i smash the mosquito on my hand that sucking on by blood right now.

My curiosity is, are the Catholics gonna look for every other masturbating man and hold his cum on their hands and put it in a plastic container and cryogenically freeze the man's juice because each one of those 40 million sperms per cubic milli litre of semen is a potential life? Wow, i'm so deviously happy because i kill about 4 billion people in my shower everyday while i jerk off to the thought of me caressing some good pam anderson lee tits.

Nice try god, we're gonna fix cancer, AIDS and what not with stem cell research in the future and miracle working televangelist's like Benny Hinn can to take a hike. What next? Masturbating is the sole evil that is causing Global Warming? Sure, bring it on. We're never tired of beating the shit out of you mother fuckers. Like this one, you will be in jail soon.

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The Photo Thief Seminar

Okay, so i think i've made up my mind on what to do and where to do stuff about this seminar.

Place: Barista, G.N. Chetty Road, T.Nagar
Time: 12 Noon
Date: 12th Oct, 2008 -  Sunday

Agenda:

1. Overview of the Copyrights Law
2. What the Law lacks?
3. How vulnerable are you images?
4. How to protect your images?
5. You've been robbed, what to do?
6. You've been robbed, what NOT to do?
7. Fair use rights, what's hot and what's not
8. Future plans for legal action and reforms on the law.
9. Q & A session.

Who needs to attend?

If you have a camera and you have displayed your images in a public space, you should come listen to this stuff. Its scary and its re-assuring as well. :-D

Fully Hyd Apologizes

Phew, i'm so damn saved. I'm just so happy i don't have to go to court and the police station again all over and run around like a rat on opium. Fully Hyd's CEO today called and apologized for the usage of the picture.

Contrary to my expectations he was not rude and in fact quite honest and apologetic about what happened. The last thing i wanted 2 days before a melbourne trip was a pending legal issue on my head and im so glad it went through fine.

Fully Hyd Steals...

I thought one was enough and one incident was the end of it but then it looks like the indian media is not done with me yet.

Today my friend Archana pointed out that a picture of hers that i took and posted on flickr was stolen by www.fullyhyd.com and used on their website without my permission. I was not asked about this picture, i was not paid, nor was i credited for this image. My work of art, lifted off my flickr photo portfolio and used, sigh!

Here is the webpage, there is a section called "The Voices of Town" and you gotta keep refreshing it. You will see a picture of a cute girl smiling, its inside a santro car. I took that pic.

Here is the Original.

Here is the stolen image on the website.

Someone is looking forward to a nasty copyright infringement lawsuit. Good Luck, FullyHyd.com. You are just about to realize that you just messed with the wrong guy.

Video from Canon 5D Mk II

Check this. 5D Mark II Videos, will be live in 12 hours. :)

Canon EOS 5D Mark II - High ISO Pictures.

Check out this Blog. Looks bloody awesome to me.

An Autobiography on short stories...

I've been watching a long lost friend of mine from my previous workplace on facebook from the recent past. It's been such a pleasure and awesome experience looking at someones life through images from 1000's of kilometres away.

Combing that thought with the fact that i now have a post arthritic condition and the quality of my life and the certainty of being independent is at great risk i felt that i should document my life more effectively. I don't really know why, perhaps im every bit of that attention freak or perhaps i want to leave my mark and i realize i haven't really made much difference till date.

Starting today, i will try and post atleast one short story every week or more than one. This will be either from a first person point of view or from a author's narrative point of view. I'm not really aiming for factual accuracy here much but i hope im correct on the incidents by atleast 90% of the time. What i attempt to do here will be to recollect snapshots of my childhood, from the earliest known times that i remember myself as an existing individual on planet earth and then go on with short stories and incidents and events in my life.

I will post these under the title #5, Sankara Madam St., which is the address of my old house, where i grew up and lived till about 21.

All person's, events and facts gathered under this posting label are true and accurate to the best of my knowledge. Names shall not be changed, events shall not be toned down or pepped up to either sound acceptable.

So without further adieu, the first chapter will be up tomorrow. As for the intro, watch out for the next post.

The Story of his Best Friend

The Indian System of Stereo-typing teaches you ridiculous things which sometimes may lead to horrible consequences like missing out some of the most charismatic experiences in life. Fresh out of college, waiting to break the bubble into the BPO industry one young fellow joined a small time call center and was put through the American Accent Training.

Quickly making use of the opportunity the young man made friends with many of the fellows and a few of the women. Then there was this loud girl who wore a pretty decent shirt and a skirt and was well dressed and seemed to be from a rich off background. As fate would have it, the young man was brainwashed that skirts and fashionable formal shirts are worn by rich arrogant bastards and they are just not worth getting to know.

The young man kept his distance and felt safe and happy amidst his custody of normal friends while his batch of colleagues at work were split into two, Batch 35A and batch 35B.
The Young man was safe in A and was trained in the first floor while the rich girl went to B and was trained in the second floor. Ill luck had it that after we graduated our American accent training batch A and B would be merged and they would all be trained together on the product and American culture.

The young mans 14 days of fun came to an end as the batches merged, the young man still kept his distance and felt content with what he had.

One fine evening post work he found his friend Neil talking to this same very arrogant rich girl whom was not to be trusted but ridiculously Neil yells out as the young man tried to slip by "Yo gates" (the young man's American name was Michael Gates) "come over here dog, this is Stacy Colin" and the young man with fear blurted a feeble "hey" and the rich arrogant woman contrary to the expectations happened to respond....

"thaaa chee, kasmaalam. gates'u boot'su... ozhunga peri solli thola da paavi"
English Translation: you useless fellow why the hell call yourself gates and boots... what's the real name you sinner.... (of course in a very very slang accent and the most lo-fi mannerism for a woman on planet earth ever!)

The young man's heart fluttered with joy "this ugly thing croaks from the same stinking swamp that I come from" and before the young man could respond the lady dragged him by the shirt collar and yelled "i'm too hungry and i need something to eat, take me to some stupid food joint". We went out as a gang of 14, i think and we counted the coins in our wallet and brought one Mini Idly at Adayar Sangeetha and shared it amongst ourselves.

Sharada was neither rich, nor arrogant. In fact she really in reality is just a kick ass clown. She can make anyone laugh at any given point in time at any place. She was just as bloody broke a stingy average middle class beggar like most of us Desi's and happens to have a good sense of fashionable dressing.

Ever since ever speck of laughter, every drop of tear, every sprinkle of joy and every dew of depression was shared between the this young man and the woman and she got to be his best friend for life. Time took them apart, he moved Bangalore job hopping, her overtly smart brains got her a 12000 pound Chevening scholarship from the British government and took her to Oxford for her masters.

A few weeks ago one fine, morning the young man got a call from her sisters mobile in the wee hours of the morning while he was fast asleep, something like 9.45 AM. He picked up the phone and he hears a familiar voice yell "dei naan vandhutten daa", yaarunnu recognize panna mudiyaradhaa?" (dude im here, can you recognize who this is?).
Years of distance and mountain loads of fun that was devoid to them resumes for the next 2 weeks while she is here for her sisters engagement.

That is the Story of how Dilip got his best friend Sharada, and where it lies in the present day.

Painless...

2 large vodka's in the head, an enya love song in the ears... small specks of happiness life has to offer, priceless!

Vaiko Meets Obama, makes pictures to prove it too!

Photo Credit: Shekhar Krishnan

Apparently Vaiko thinks none of us read the newspapers or do not know who Barrack Obama is. Its either than or he was smoking ACID when he asked for this posted to be printed.

For my dear Caucasian, African-American, Latino, Spanish, French, European, Hispanic and whatever the race from you are and if you do not know who Vaiko is, take it from me with faith. He is an asshole. For starters he supports the LTTE and then the list is endless.

Apparently vaiko met obama in Chicago when he was in one of his official visits to the US of A blowing our indian middle class tax money. Now the trouble is, indian people are hard to convince on some of this shit and hence vaiko did the obvious. Guess what? Yes, he made the picture himself.

Wedding Woes...

One of my Aunt married a Muslim and obviously converted due to the very reason. I was invited to this wedding of her son and believe me, i was excited like hell. I've never been to a Muslim wedding before and this was my first time. I aspired to acquaint myself with my aunts in laws, get to know them more and hang out with them more since i've never done that all of these years during my childhood and i decided its time to set the record straight.

Coming from a typical Hindu Brahmin family, although there was not any opposition to this wedding of my aunt to her muslim boyfriend in a way the family ties were kind of loosened and broken and none of us family guys really kept in touch with her and i felt this was my chance to set it straight. Of course when she comes over to family occasions at our house there is always a distance because of the difference in cultural aspects such as language, behavior and perspectives. I frankly did not like this much but never did much to change things until now.

I pack my gear and im 2 hours early for the wedding and im thinking im gonna have a great time. Little did i know that i was going to be the biggest fool of all times sitting here like duck to witness sexism, male chauvinism and trade in the name of a wedding go on right in front of my eyes while i could not find the nerve to say nothing or do nothing in the situation.

The wedding hall was very small and all the men were lodged in the ground floor where the wedding ceremony took place and guess what? All the women were debarred from staying downstairs and sent to the first floor, including the Bride whom i never got to meet in this entire agenda of the wedding. The grooms father paid a sum of "13 grams of gold" and purchased the bride for his son, the groom. The agreement or the contract of the wedding was signed and everybody went to dig into the food like it was nobody's business.

I ask this guy who looked like a politician, about the bride and he said that the wedding was over and the bride will be seeing the guests in the evening at the reception where she will be together with the groom. It strikes me as the most inhumane and barbaric act of sexism on a woman, in the 21st century that based on some book a pedophile wrote 100's of years back you don't even look at the fact that there is someone important uninvited into the wedding, let me correct that. "Her Wedding", the bride!

While being repeatedly preached about the importance of gender equality in an Anglo Indian school for 12 years, running around a 2 day occasion of the bride and groom doing various religious stuff at a Hindu wedding and the mutual consent at a Christian Anglo Indian weddings that i've been to i frankly find not having a person who is getting married not to be during the wedding process so unacceptable and sadistic in nature.

Today while i finally mustered up the courage to post these pictures and write these words from my head, i admit that im afraid of such people. The world Islamaphobia as i realize is not some cooked up stuff by the liberals, it exists very well in real life and there is ample evidence for it and i feel it first hand.

Pehli Nazar Mein can go fuck itself!

I was sitting at this pub last night and they were playing desi night and the song was "Pehli Nazar Mein Kya Jadu Kar Diya" and i thought, "what an amazing number!". I've heard this before on a couple of friends/colleagues caller tune and i did not like this song much but listening to it in a club in full quality was like Christmas for me and it made it, i became a fan and i downloaded this album today (RACE) and listened to it.

I was trying to see how the video for this fantastic number would look like and i found more than what i was looking for on youtube. I know i may be late by weeks or months and this is old news but still......

You may download the Original Sarang Hae Yo from here.

In the wake of copyright infringements that haven't really made me a happy person and knowing how the Indian Copyright Act, 1957 and its amendment, the last one being almost 9 years ago in 1999 (after which the Internet changed everything and its existence this act is oblivious about) being such a joke, i just thought i would let the few people who listen to Hindi music and probably love this song, its stolen...

It's someone else's hard work that's been lifted just because you are a brown man here and your vague laws protect you from prosecution.... i feel it very unfair and very painful. I don't know what i can as an individual do. I took off this song from my MP3 player and i updated it with the Original Korean song, i care not if i don't get the language. To feel love, words are not a necessity. The though i think is enough with the wonderful feeling.

I'm thinking i will spread this message to everyone i know so that they are listening to a thief and this is stolen shit. If that sense of guilt could help, i guess that makes my day.

An Account of a Civil Engineering Marvel...

Have you ever been to historic places in south India and ever wondered why the heck on earth you find so many ugly holes on huge rocks, right next to nice carvings and scriptures? Well if you have the discovery DVD's and seen it already, good enough. The folks who still have no clue, listen carefully.

The maximum load that you are allowed to transport in the USA by road is about 30 tonnes. Anything more than this requires a license and specialized equipment and of course a lot of things. Now come to India, rewind your time way back to say 3500 B.C or 300 B.C or 700 A.D when most of these huge temples were built. We did not have airplanes, we did not have trucks or cranes to do the job. Nope, god did not do shit as usual, nor did black magic or divine power. Engineering science did the job.

The average weight of each and every rock is about 1300 tonnes and many of them shot past the regular 7000 tonne mark. Now how do you take these rocks up the hill, about 700 meters up the sea level? The simple answer is you gotta break them into pieces and take them, but then how the heck do you break such huge rocks. If your answer was drill and hammer them out, sorry mate, you scored an F :-) (i did too!)

Drilling, hammering et all was time consuming and resourceful and required impossible amount of manpower and horsepower. Explosives are a thing that happened a few hundred years ago and were unheard of during these times. Even if they were available, blasting off mountain rocks meant you could not use them properly and cut it on a shape you wanted them to come out for specific purposes. So, here is what they did.

Instead of breaking the entire rock, they drilled very small holes into them along the line where the rock was meant to be broken. As soon as the holes were drilled, soft pieces of wood was thrust into these holes and the rock was heated so that it would expand (remember the physics lesson, objects expand on heat) and they thrust more soft wood into these holes and sealed them with mud and plastered it with lime. Now pour cold water  over it in large quantities, the rock cools down and contracts, however the wood inside absorbs the water and expands due to its soft nature and absorbing characteristic. So rock shrinks, wood enlarges/expands and thereby forces the rock to crack along the lines where the wholes were drilled.

Ta daa! You have a neatly cut rock precise to the line where the engineer drew the line and you could not cut them again into smaller pieces till they could be carried over or carved here for whatever use they were meant to be. That's exactly how they did it. Engineering freaking genius, 1000's of years back!

Bad Questions to ask a transsexual.

Awesome Video. I can't relate to this more than now.

It's funny how many of those dumb asses there are really who would really ask such fucked up questions in the first place. I know this personally I get some really fucked up questions all the time. gggawwhh! I wish the world was filled with more smart people who had brains the size of a common ground squirrel and would have the basic moral judgement to know what questions are ok and not ok to ask.

del.icio.us Tags: transsexuals,questions,youtube video,humour,throught,education

Withered

I work at Tidel Park, I live in Velachery. Now the road to Tidel Park via the Tharamani Link Road is kind of Tedious. So folks like me usually take a short cut short after the CSI church on this road and go through a well cemented slum dwelling and reach the Ascendas IT Park Road. This saves about 2 Kilo meters of Travelling distance, fuel and of course most importantly avoid the damn traffic!

I'm a bit off the usual folks (which is not unusual at all) and I take this small road that takes me through a set of speed breaker ridden street that hurts the spine like crazy. Yet, I drive through this road. Why? The reason is obvious, the road is short, cold, winding and has this temple and small houses of slum dwellings and has an absolute village atmosphere amidst the polluted city. Its such a refreshing experience to travel down this road, look at the rituals in the temple as you drive by, have the cows cross the road all the way, goats, dogs, hen, cats, there is just so much to see.

I happened to be driving back home and I had the camera with me and I stopped by to get a few pictures of this temple structure. Its worn out but an active temple on the road side. The fresh paint has been eroded by the summer rains in Chennai. I just love this place, I do.

Canon EOS 400D with the Sigma 24-70MM F/2.8. Aperture Priority, F/4 at 1/320th of a Second.

del.icio.us Tags: religion,street photograhy,daily life,blog,camera,photogrpahy,image,nearby nature,india,info,temple,withered,colours,texture

Hell's Angel - Mother Teresa

A perspective nobody wants to hear about Mother Teresa. One does not need to be an expert in social work or political history to open your eyes and see what is reality. Just take into account what she claimed to be doing and then compare it with what she actually did in reality and you see an enormous gap in the data.

So where did all the money go and where is all that 1500 plus feeding centres established by Mother Teresa in Calcutta? I mean, I was there in Calcutta not a year ago, all I saw was like one broke ass centre which was accessible to a hand picked few Dalit Christians who possessed the food card that allowed you entry into the home that gave away free food.

Secondly, where are those 15000 plus odd people that are fed? The last time I heard it was nothing more than 300 people out of which close to 190 are employees of the Mother's Home themselves.

What more, with all the money and funding she had the Home was nothing better to a refugee camp in Africa. They provide minimal medicines to their sick and ailing inmates, like say brufen, anacin, procin kind of basic tablets doctors do not even prescribe anymore because of their well known side effects and ineffectiveness and also because of the availability of better drugs in the present time.

Then there are mentally challenged women who are almost nude. They don't have proper clothes to cover what a woman needs to cover up in public space, beasts and crotch. Yes, you can see all of that here and no you don't need to be a pervert to keep a peep at the cleavage, Mother's home makes it easier for you by purposefully not dressing up their inmates properly. Why? Because they want you to see starvation, sickness and pain everywhere so that your money will flow into their bank accounts.

They don't treat the sick well because they believe in salvation of the human soul through pain. Jesus Christ suffered at the cross. Similarly they believe in suffering at the hands of disease and attaining salvation through pain.

Hygienic standards, oh yes. They are the best, I could say and I could not be more sarcastic. There is a 6  by 4 bed that everybody lies in, all of them lined up in a hall. No room to move, no adequate ventilation because there are not much fans for the huge hall but for a few. With a high number of communicable disease and the inmates not being able to bathe in a daily basis due to water shortage (because the home cannot afford to buy water, apparently) infection is a critical issue that no one gives a damn about in this place.

It's very confusing to me, Hindu temples like Tirumala and Tirupathi have to pay taxes (approximately US$700 million) and declare their income which is used for maintaining churches and mosques. However Mother's home and any other church/mosque for that matter have a free run here tax free unquestioned about their income and expenditure activities. We know for fact that donations from India alone cross approximately 80 Million US dollars every year.

Where is that money, why do these people have to live in such pathetic conditions despite such enormous funds at their disposal. If this were for anyone else "Human Rights Violation" the press would have screamed, oh well its a Christian outfit and its Mother Teresa, I mean its not some ordinary pauper whom you can do all your yelling on.

All is fair in love and war but Mother Teresa, sorry bitch, you aren't getting my money. I will give it to the local church or nunnery who really feed the poor and take care of them and voluntarily declare their income and expenses and don't convert people and secretly baptise people in the name of charity. You are dead anyway's and you can peacefully burn in hell if there is one in the first place.

del.icio.us Tags: blog,Mother Teresa,Relaity,Emotion,Religion,Charity,Hell's Angel,Orphanage

Update

Okay, so its been quite a while since i update this space. I tell you folks, your personal blog is a fantastic place, why this sudden enlightenment? Because i've been blogging lately at "Chennai Metroblogging" and i tell you the experience has been a real roller coaster ride.

Firstly im not even sure if i fit in that place however i found out that the forum has an advantage of having yourself heard so the offer is not bad after all. I blogged some stuff over there and i was told it was to be a "Chennai related stuff only" info to be posted.

I really did not get it, if a guy buys something and happens to one of the first in chennai and then writes a review about it isnt that unique for chennai? Looks like it is not so according to almost everyone in there which leads me to conclude not everybody could be wrong and accusing me so maybe im wrong!

Nevertheless i've found out this whole new concept of a group of people and they call them "Trolls". Wow, sounds sexy doesn't it? The things they do however are so fucking gay! All they wanna do is piss on you and tell you whatever you wrote is deep shit and they get personal with you too. I've been having quite a lot of fun with these assholes, seriously. I'm giving it right back and its getting interesting, although im advised not to respond or react to any of these so called "trolls". The thing is makes me so spineless if someone bullshits with me and i have to keep quite, im just not taking that advice from the metro blogging peers. I give it write back, i know its bringing more shit in but hey there is no turning back when you are neck deep into it and the last thing on earth a scoripio like me would do is turn back.

Other updates in life other than metro blogging, i got a new camera body. Yippeee, no more changing lenses and dust on sensor issues. Secondly some friends, so called friends have been acting real busy man. Unfortunately i found out co-incidentally (its a small world you see!) that they have not been that real busy as they claim to be and have been having lotsa fun, just that this time around they think they found better friends to hook up with.

So i gave them all the middle finger and i decided im not calling any of these dogs/bitches again.

Long time after i went to mala's place today with a WINE bottle! You gotta see that look on our Iyer/Iyengar brahmna aaththu persigal faces when you get a sarakku bottle home and gift it. Its priceless man! Damn i did not take pictures of these sweet oldies when i got wine home. So much for the fact that it was "DE-Alchoholized Wine" from australia! I guess me and mala would have been slayed to death like one of those english movies with a chainsaw if that was real wine!

Phew! What a conception these tamil movies have brought into the heads of our parents about liquor. I wish i could only get drunk on one teaspoon of wine, that would be great, unfortunately oldies.. alcohol does not work like that and you guys are never gonna understand it.

Planning a photoshoot with a friend by the 4th Nov weekend, i hope this time it does not get postponed like it happened last two times. Lets see how things go.

Thats all the update as of now, lets see how things work out.

C'ya, take care...